We decided today would be our spring cleaning at our apartment, but only one of us has been hard at work. While I've been scrubbing the baseboards, you've been running to the bathroom for long stretches of times. Sure, you claim it's your upset tummy but I can hear the sports station blaring from your phone. So I have a solution, you'll be wearing diapers the rest of the day while we clean. That way, you'll have no excuse to stop what you're doing and be stuck on the toilet. I have thick, crinkly, plain white diaper just your size, that you'll be having tapped on tightly by me on our bed. Don't worry, I have the sweet smelling baby powder to cover you with so diaper rash won't happen. I don't need anything else that will make you whine! You'll be able to pee in the diaper quite a few times, of course it will swell and you'll have an adorable waddle, but at least our apartment will be clean. And yes, even if you have to go #2, the diaper is thick enough to hold it so you can keep on cleaning. I'll be taking breaks to look out the window as you mow the lawn, waiting for those droopy pants to sag. Maybe if you're good and finish all your chores without fussing, you'll get a happy ending reward when I change your diaper.