You've been job hunting for such a long time, but the prospects have been bleak. I ran into my uncle this morning, and guess what? He offered to hire you, all you have to do is show up to his company Monday morning. Um, the position is a bit out of your usual line of work, it's more like product research. You'll be testing the adult diapers his company makes. All you have to do is stay hydrated all day, wet your diaper and then measure how much you went. It's the cushiest job you'll ever have- no pun intended. I even brought home samples of the diapers you'll be testing, and picked up some essentials you'll be needing for your new gig, to keep you from getting diaper rash.