I walk into the bathroom, pull down my pants and sit on the toilet. I start telling you about all the vegetables I ate yesterday and how much gas I had last night. Broccoli....cauliflower...brussels sprouts....Oh My! They've caused a stir in my guts, giving me crampy pains and now I can feel it all ready to come out. I start to push and it feels big! It comes out in one big plop and a couple of little ones in the toilet bowl, which I look between my legs to get a good look at and the smell comes wafting up into my face. I then take a pee, wipe everything, pull my pants up and watch as I make sure this monster log flushes down the toilet. I have to flush a couple of times but it still leaves some brown skid marks on the side of the toilet bowl....oh well....I just walk back out of the bathroom, forgetting to wash my hands.