I'm Going On A Date With Someone Better

Oh, nothing... Just casually getting all gussied up for a date tonight with a cute guy that's way more interesting in you. Meanwhile, you'll wait at home like a sad loser while I get wined, dined, and fucked by a stranger that is hotter, smarter, and better than you. All of this could have been avoided if you didn't waste your time at your boring job, fucked better, and could hold up at least 5 minutes of intelligent conversation. Now I'm making myself pretty for this guy when I've never done it for you. Isn't that sad?