Don't worry, you are still going to church this Sunday, but things are going to be a little different this time. Can you imagine your throbbing prick pressing against a cold little cage while kneeling at your churches pew? Will you be praying to "god" or praying to Princess Ivy? Sundays are for sexless sinners so I know when I encourage you to reveal your chastity secret to the priest in confession, you will.