Another year, another opportunity lost of ever cashing in that V-card. Logically you’ve given up hope but every now and then there’s a little tinge of hope and regret. Halloween came and went, no one dreamed of dressing in a couples costume with you. No date for Thanksgiving. No gift exchanges for Christmas. No one to kiss at midnight when the ball drops for 2022. You’re fucking alone. And worse than alone you’re a virgin for life. I’m so kind and generous for even letting you gaze upon me, don’t you think? No one wants to be with you, no one wants to even pity fuck you. But I spend My valuable time talking to you… I guess you could say I’m your entire sex life…