I start off talking about how enormous I feel that I have to get undressed because these clothes are just too tight. I let you in on a little secret, I'm not pregnant at all. There's an itialian restaurant that lets pregnant women eat for free and I've been stuffing my face there everyday, so much so that I've actually grown to start truly looking pregnant but now I'm worried I'm in real trouble. I beg you to get me some medicine to help calm my tummy because I feel like I'm going to burst... please please hurry back I'm going to pop like a balloon!!..