RICH BETAS ONLY!!! No broke bitches allowed—move along. Now that I’m speaking directly to my intended audience, I want to make one thing clear: just because you have a much more appealing a$pect about you that entices me, it doesn’t make you any less inferior. The fact that you’re willing to buy this clip means that you have something of a bigger appetite, possibly one to match mine. And lucky for you—lucky for me—I have plenty of opportunities for you to explore all the ways you can be even more and exclusively useful to me. Ways that too many others quickly and easily fall disappointingly short. But not you. And that already makes you one of my favorites. But that’s not a position you want to take for granted: you will still push, work, sacrifice according to my expensive and lavish expectations. Are you up for the challenge only a special beta like you has the opportunity to face?