Are you excited to finally spend the night with me? I sure am! I know this isn't what you expected, but trust me, you're going to make the perfect fart filter for me under the covers. The thick blanket will create a very intense dutch oven in which you'll be surrounded by dense toxins produced from my thick meaty ass. My farts are so powerful. They're making you woozzy, but I won't let you escape. You have to do this all night, every night for the rest of your life. My crack is going to be so sweaty and your tongue will be deep inside it cleaning and slurping out gas. All you're going to think about is the smell. The taste. The textures. This is just what you deserve.