It's cool in the house again, so I arrive in the bathroom squirming and lean over the bathroom sink until I can regain my composure. Of course, what do I do the moment I get my composure back? Go sit on the toilet like a normal person? No, of course not. I play with my hair in the mirror. I get to the toilet, and I can feel the morning stiffness, so as I slide my sweatpants down my thick thighs, I stretch before I sit my ass on the toilet, delaying the inevitable, for just a little longer. I need more comfort than pissing alone can provide me, so I pull my sweater up over my large soft belly and lose myself in it's curves and rolls, totally losing count of how long I peed for.