You jerk off to escape your reality. You are not doing that to pleasure yourself as much as loosing your sense of self and break free from your ego until you orgasm. When you cum, the explosion is not liberation, the relief is short and disappointing. What is coming before all that feels so much better, the complete loss of control, the sexual despair, the compulsive aching for more, the dilution of your thoughts process in the arousal, your rational mind completely shutting down before you shoot your load. THAT feels good. No it feels right. In fact, it feels like you should feel like that all the time. The ultimate escape from reality is horniness, when you are horny, this is the only thing that matters. And you want to stay in that state and never come back to reality, right ? Let me help you.