Ooooh my gosh you won't believe what I just found at the back of my closet...these old dress pants I used to wear. They would be perfect for work but...my ass has expanded over the years and I'm worried they won't fit. I'm going to try them on...wish me luck. But wait, what if they rip while I'm AT work? The squat test? Yeah! That'll be perfect - OK, here I go.