I was tired of watching you mope around the office so I took a peek at your emails. I discovered that your poor performance was based on the constant rejection you experience as a man with a pathetic, tiny little cock. Instead of firing you, I'm going to make you My pet project. I'm going to micromanage you into a girthy wallet. Your portfolio can grow even if your cock never does. And of course this doesn't guarantee you pussy. Women will never want to fuck you. But at least you can finally gain positive female attention. I'm the best boss in the world.