Another year alone on Valentine’s Day? Good. That’s what I want for you. By this point, you should be deliberately avoiding dating. If you still have a dating app, delete it right now. Your celibacy is an important aspect of your servitude. Your orgasms, when permitted, are exclusively for me. Sex would tarnish your commitment and your good boy status. It would be disappointing and embarrassing for you, and it would divert you from your true purpose: serving me. Tonight, you have a date with destiny: your destiny as MY eternally celibate gooner, edging yourself so deep into the goon hole that you realize you don’t even miss it, you don’t even want it. This is the only way for you and being sexless never felt so good.