Hello, ass man. I know precisely why you're here. I know you're going to beg and plead to be allowed near my ass. You have such a little fetish for it, don't you? You're truly so pathetic! All sorts of men have begged to just be near my ass - men that are richer than you, better looking than you, smarter than you, and harder working than you. Why on earth would you think I'd let you near my juicy cheeks when I have all of them clamouring for it? You have nothing to offer me, you idiot. The only service you could possibly do for me is filthy, but that might be perfect for a loser of your caliber. You can be my trailing, human portapotty, following me around like a shadow, always ready whenever I need to go...