Well hello there, welcome to my office. My name is Jasmin M and I’m your new financial advisor. I’ve looked through your accounts and I’m pleased to take you on as my client. We do things a little different around here though… Some may say a little morally corrupt. I saw your eyes light up as I walked in the room and I knew INSTANTLY that you were going to be extremely easy to seduce and manipulate. That’s right, I’m going to have you pumping money into my accounts and stroking to spreadsheet porn from this day onwards. You’ve signed on the dotted line and now I’m in TOTAL control of your fucked finances. My juicy tits have already lead you into debt riddled, destructive road of no return. I’m so pleased to have you as a desperate, leaking, financially fucked client!