I see in my notes that you are here for therapy surrounding the concept of findom? I can tell from what you’re saying that it concerns you that you have this kink and that you continue to pay a certain woman for her time. I must say, it would be incredibly hard for that woman to have you disappear! I think instead, that you need to just adjust your life to suit her needs and to make sure she is provided for! Maybe you should take out more loans or credit cards? Maybe even getting another job in any free time you have! You can’t possibly just disappear on her. Trust me, this is what I think is best for you as your therapist.