t's America's birthday, aka the most gluttonous and by far the fattest country in the world. Of course, it's never too early to start celebrating; no better time to dig into a giant sugary apple pie and indulge. The most interesting thing about the average American diet is the amount of sugar, carbs, fat, and processed food in it. That, combined with a total lack of physical activity, is slowly rotting the brain, making me, and many others, fatter and dumber. You can see it in the way people talk. For me, it's like I'm slowly stringing the words together, trying to figure out what comes next. Not to mention the complete lack of self-control and dignity it takes to continue to stuff your face despite not even being able to fit into your shorts. Greedy, overfed, and slowly getting dumber. The American way. *** Clip features: fat bimbo, eating, tight shorts, fat belly, burps, fatter future