I know you're a pathetic sinner, lost in your filth and shame. But I, your Master, know exactly how to cleanse you of your wretched sins. Come with me, and I'll show you the path to your salvation. Get on your knees, you worthless worm, and worship my BBC. Pray to it with every ounce of your pathetic being, beg for its mercy, and maybe – just maybe – you'll find a sliver of redemption in its divine presence. Now suck it. Suck it and with every suck your new god will strengthen your faith.