You are my pathetic boyfriend that I only keep around to keep my house tidy and pay my rent. The rest of the time I have you tied up in my spare room, away, so I don't have to think about you. I've gotten so good at this in fact that I even came into the room where you were bound and gagged, managed to completely ignore you whilst I chatted and took some sexy exposit nude picture for men on the internet. You should be thanking me for this little show I gave you. That reminds me we need to talk about putting me on your credit card account from now on!