What better way to tell you that you'll NEVER date me and NEVER be my boyfriend than in a skin-tight and really short dress? Here's a little bit of reject truth serum: we'll never go out on a date! Think I want to have people all around us in public staring, wondering why someone of my physical caliber is hanging out a toad like you? Nope, the closest you'll get are tweets, e-mails, and orders for sending me money and funding my lavish life while you sit at home, dateless, lonely, ruminating on why you'll never date Goddess.