It’s my birthday! Which means EVERYTHING is about me. I mean….let’s be honest, everything is typically about me, but my birthday just means I’m EVER brattier! I celebrate the ENTIRE month of May because my bday deserves to last more than just one day. I deserve to be celebrated all month. What did you do for your bday, loser? Did you sit at home and cry because no one cares about your day? Did you cry because you didn’t get to have bday sex? Did you fuck your hand pussy all night and lube it with your tears? Our birthdays are complete opposites! I bet no one even texted you hbd. I bet you only got a text from your mom. NO ONE gives a fuck about your birthday. You’re a NO ONE! You’re a NOBODY! My bday is full of HBD texts and payment notifications from random internet weirdos. Oh…and I’m in Tulum with my best friend spending beta ca$h. I’m living the fucking dream. Contrast to your reality. You’re a fucking loser. You spent your bday crying and jerking to humiliation porn. No one wants to be seen with you in public. No wonder you didn’t do anything for you bday. And this will never change. This next bday will be the same and the one after that. Forever a shitty bday for you.