Welcome to therapy! We’ve had a few sessions together so far. I don’t think there’s been any progress. You lie to me about how you’re doing and I’m very disappointed in you. How can you expect for therapy to help you if you don’t tell me the truth. You said that your home life has been going well, but your wife called me before your session to share some things with me. She said that you’ve been coming home late, showing up to work late, you miss dinner, and you’re not around for your family. I think you have a problem and you need to be rehabilitated. I’ve been researching a new, more aggressive form of therapy. I think you’d be the perfect candidate. Have you ever gotten your ass fucked before? I think it will really help you put things into perspective